In this post I am going to share with You some of my ideas to express “I love” in unusual ways. I have to admit that even in this most amazing field of life which is love sometimes I struggle with boredom and routine. I decided that I don’t want to be overwhelmed by these feelings or be stuck in a rut so after a long prayer I wrote myself down some ideas to change my approach. I tried my best to make these ideas as practical as possible hoping that You actually would be able to implement them in Your day-to-day life. They cover a wide range of topics, from love for others (in the broad sense of the word) to love for ourselves which is just as important. I firmly believe that if we put our hearts into the small daily challenges, our love and empathy will shine and inspire next people and generations.
“You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” – Mk 12:31a
- Work on Your emotions first before meeting the other person
Recently this point has definitely been my 'number one’. The more I work with my self-consciousness, the more I see that a lot of tedious emotional work has to be done before entering into healthy relationships. I suppose that lots of You also have some memories of unhealthy tension, aggressive behavior or pressure in relationships. World doesn’t have to be like that under one condition- we are the ones who should start working on our emotions and connections with others. We need to prevent our loved ones and future generations from rehashing our failures. Of course, we are not able to change the entire world all at once but instead we can influence our close environment which would make a huge difference.
If You feel overloaded with feelings and emotions and You cannot cope with them by Yourself, You can try going to a therapy. A good psychologist can help You name and clarify the hard stuff You are going through. I myself have had a couple of sessions and I am very grateful for having made this decision. Definitely starting therapy is nothing wrong, I would say it’s just the opposite. Giving ourselves an opportunity to get help when we need it can be the best decision in our lives. Nowadays’ psychology has many tools to help people understand the intricacies of their minds. Everyone struggles with something- to admit it is to give Yourself a chance to grow and change.
Another amazing tool to work with emotions is the idea od 'journaling’. Naming what we are going through in the very moment is a great achievement itself! Very often I see that a great deal of my frustration and anger comes from emotions that I haven’t yet processed. When I feel that my head is overloaded with thoughts and my body is full of tension I make myself a huge cup of tea, I take my diary, a pen and I start writing. When I let my emotions vent, I am able to name some of them that appear most often and I can see some kind of pattern. If I experience an irritation every couple of days or weeks I ask myself where it comes from and what I could possibly do to eliminate it from my life. Clearly, journaling is only an introduction to working towards full, satisfied life and relationships. The first step You should take is to name what You are going through right now and the second step is to implement real changes to make the hard stuff appear in Your life more and more rarely.
If You would like to dive deeper into this topic, I highly recommend You a YouTube channel: Therapy in a Nutshell.
2. Let go and make some time for Yourself
Learning how to become assertive has been one of the hardest things I have been through in my life so far. I always wanted to be able to please everyone, everywhere and always. Luckily, now I already know that this is a dead concept, impossible to achieve.
When I said 'yes’ to everything my friends, relatives, peers wanted me to do or participate in, my everyday 'to-do list’ was endless! There were many times when I was wandering how on earth I could make days longer in order to be able to complete all the tasks.
My journey of “letting go” is connected with many areas of my life- from my works/study life, through personal goals to relationships with others. When I notice that I get stuck in thinking that I should do everything more and better, I take a deep breath and I wonder: 'Is it really what I need in this moment?’. I sit with this in mind a couple of minutes until my inner tension is released.
When in some situations You say 'no’, the world is not going to end! We are all only humans- everyone needs some time for themselves and rest. Read a book, go to sleep earlier, go for a walk- Your needs are actually extremely important.
3. Consume less products of animal origin
A not very obvious point, but in terms of times we live in nowadays, extremely crucial. Love doesn’t have to be only about us and other people. By making some decisions and implementing them in our day-to-day lives we can influence our environment and what is more, give the future generations a chance to live on this planet before climate changes will totally blow us off.
I know that switching for vegetarian or vegan diet is quite a challenge. For those who are sceptical about reducing the amount of meat, eggs and dairy in their diet I recommend a book ’We Are the Weather: Saving the Planet Begins at Breakfast’ by Jonathan Safran Foer. In a very honest, clear way the author writes about the influence of animal industry on our climate. In his publication he suggests a very practical concept to help You reduce animal products from Your diet. The main rule is very simple: no products of animal origin for breakfast. What does it mean in practical terms? If You cut off animal products from Your breakfast (still being 'allowed’ to eat whatever You want for lunch and dinner) overall the consumption of such products drops by 30%! If many people decide on implementing such change in their lives not only will they maintain better health, but also the level of carbon footprint coming from the industrial farming will decrease!
4. Switch your car for a bike and fall in love with walks!
Changing Your main mean of transport for one that requires more psychical effort brings a huge amount of advantages! A positive influence that physical activity has on our well-being is truly amazing. If You decide to increase the amount of exercise in Your daily life, You show that You love and care for Your body. What is more, after doing some exercise like walking (especially in fast pace) or cycling, Your mind will be more clear and You will have more energy and eagerness to work. Physical activity lowers the level of tension and stress and thanks to it Your body produces dopamine, serotonin and endorphins- known as the 'feel-good hormones’.
Apart of these health advantages, this choice is also 'eco’. By switching a car for a 'green’ mean of transport we generate less pollution and (taking the present fuel costs into consideration) it is also a great way to save up some money!
5. Become a volunteer
I think that there is no better way to love others than giving them our time and attention through helping. Nowadays there are thousands of people who are waiting for us to take action. Child care homes, environmental lounges, animal shelters, foundations helping elderly or poor people- You can choose from many options. From my personal experience regarding voluntary work I know that the people we serve aren’t the only ones who experience the pluses of voluntary work- after some time helping we can feel needed, fulfilled, satisfied and happy! Through such experiences we have a great chance to learn new skills, become more empathetic and non-judgmental. Voluntary work might also be a chance to meet other like-minded people and make new friends! Thousands of advantages! 😃
6. Donate money for a charity/foundation
Though firstly I recommend You to become a volunteer, I am conscious that some people wouldn’t be able to manage. If for some reason You feel that being a volunteer isn’t possible in Your present situation there is another option for You! You can donate some money for those who need it. I bet there is a field that resonates with You the most: the issue of climate changes, women’s rights, kids education or refugees. A list of cases that call for our attention is endless! Through sharing some money with organizations that work on such cases, You might have a real impact on the world around.
If Your are suspicious about the credibility of charities, You can check out this website: https://www.givewell.org. The organizations listed there are the most effective in improving or saving the lives of many people in terms of funds allocated.
As You can see, “I love” can be expressed in many ways. Clearly, my list might have been longer, yet I invite You to discover Your own special ways to love. Don’t feel limited by anything- love actually touches every sphere of life.
What do You think of my ideas? What are Your favorite ways to express love and have positive impact? I can’t wait to read Your comments and messages!
With love,
Kasia
Nice and very inspiring one! 😀